grief, sadness and even anger

I still feel sick from the accident I had yesterday. Every time I try to blog about I start crying... again. I thank God for my terrific friends and neighbors who came to my rescue when I called them for help (Cindy and Allen you ARE the BEST). The whole ordeal has left me with these weird feelings, of grief, sadness and even anger.

You see- I hit a white dog coming out of a snow bank. I didn't even see him until it was too late. There is ice on the roads out here and snow all around. When I got out of my vehicle to check on the dog, it had on a collar but no tags, and when the animal control unit came out, the dog was scanned and it didn't have a microchip. There was no way of knowing who the owner was.

Myself and another kind soul who stopped to help me went around to all of the neighboring homes knocking on doors to see if the dog belonged to any of them- no one would answer their door (and I was pounding very hard). That right there is frightening, what if it was a really bad car accident and that there were people who were severely hurt or even dieing? People just do not want to get involved these days.

The police came out but no report was made. Then a woman in a truck stopped by that said that she was taking care of the dog and she made it very clear that it's not her dog. She saw the damaged done to the front of my vehicle and asked if it was caused by the accident and through my sobs I said yes. She said that she didn't think that her insurance would cover the accident, she then scooped up the dog, put it in the back of her truck and drove off. I was told by the animal control officer that I need to drive up the road a bit and pull off so I can compose myself. If it weren't for my friend sending her husband out to make sure I was okay I would have felt that no one gave a rats ass about how I was feeling (I was sobbing my eyes out). The police and animal control agent sure didn't seem to care that I was so upset about hurting an animal nor the fact that my car is damaged. Believe it or not but no report was written about the accident. I had to actually go into the police department and request that they write one up- they looked at me as if I was from Mars. Then the two of them told me, "Lady, it was only a dog- it'll cost you more in labor then it's worth in filing a claim with your insurance company". There's no mention if the lady who took the dog was even it's care taker or if it was taken to a veterinarian. I cried off and on all day long yesterday. It's still got me feeling rather shaken today. By all means make sure that your gates are closed when letting your dog out to go potty or if you don't have a fence be sure to put them on a leash! This ordeal has shaken me to the core and I'll be writing something about this very thing (leaving out the fact that I hit an animal with my car). Please keep me in your prayers so that I am able to move past this.

and on an even sadder note- I have to take pictures of the front of my vehicle today for the insurance company and there's dog hair stuck in the front of it- I swear I'm going to start crying again!